By Edna Oliveros | Original Post at EdnaOliveros.com
Are you always looking for a balance between your career and your role at home? Do you find yourself thinking that you could be dedicating more time to your children, when in fact you don’t even have time to yourself? Do you tell yourself you will try to be more patient at home, but work is so stressful that simple things set you off?
In today’s pressurised and competitive work environment, most women suffer from the, “I’m not doing enough syndrome” and keep striking for the next target without even enjoying the good and bad things that happen every day. When it comes to self-growth or “me time,” it always feels like a waste of time. You even try to schedule your pregnancy around the rest of your life, so you can feel like you can tick the box. Indeed, you’ve been working so hard that you feel that making a baby is another task on your list and when you realise that nature doesn’t work with lists, you start reconnecting with the principals.
Back in the day, our grandmothers used to prepare their whole lives to become mothers and used to focus entirely on nurturing the baby inside of them once they had conceived. They even stayed home to take care of everything and even then, our grannies never had enough time.
I’m not saying that we’ll have to go back to be stay-at-home moms to have more time to focus on our pregnancies and children. Instead, I want to bring awareness to the enormous capacity modern moms have to combine family life and career. Additionally, these days, many couples are far away from their extended families and unfortunately don’t have a support network they could lean on to help raise their children. Both men and women work full time in very demanding roles, and it feels as if there’s never enough time for anything else.
Women instinctively put family first which means that their needs and own health tend to come last. Moms seem to have the power to overcome pain — some of my clients can’t even remember the last time they did something for themselves.
I know exactly how it feels, and even without knowing you, I can see your struggles and feel your exhaustion. The good news is that you’re not alone. Many women like you are struggling and working hard to make things work. But how to find balance after motherhood?
Below you’ll find some simple steps you can take to overcome burnout and move in the right direction. Start prioritising yourself without feeling guilty for doing so. A happy mother translates into a happy family. Small steps count!
- Do something that makes you happy each day. Keep it simple but meaningful. A cup of well-done coffee, a walk in the park, listening to a song, 10 min of yoga. Find that something that gets you out of your routine even for a few minutes and DO IT.
- Avoid counting calories and aim to eat whole foods — avoid sugar, gluten, vegetable oils, and processed food. What you eat has a tremendous impact on your mood and energy levels. It also helps to keep your weight under control.
- Pay attention to your sleep habits and if you’re not sleeping enough, ask for help. Rest is key for our physical and mental wellbeing.
- Introduce some movement maybe by joining a fitness course – Zoom has made our lives more convenient and you can do an activity that makes you happy even remotely.
- Reconnect with your passions. Take some time to do something that fulfils you. Are you a painter? A knitter? A gamer? Think of those old habits that you gave up as time wore on. Try to take it up again for even five minutes out of your day.
- Consider some breathing exercises. Praying or any kind of mindfulness that allows you to cope with stress.
- Ask for help.
I know this sounds like a dream and you may be wondering when you would have the time to do all of it, but the truth is that you only need to find the motivation to take the first step. And you don’t have to do it all — start with one that resonates with you most and give it a try. — If it doesn’t work you won’t lose anything, but if it does, I promise you’ll feel happier and more
accomplished.
Organise your priorities and reconnect with yourself and the main principles of life:
good nutrition, movement, quality sleep, love and connection.
